Waiter Rant: Thanks for the Tip--Confessions of a Cynical Waiter | 
 enlarge | Author: Steve Dublanica Aka The Waiter
Publisher: Ecco
Category: Book
List Price: $24.95
Buy New: $13.80
You Save: $11.15 (45%)
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Rating:  155 reviews
Sales Rank: 1734
Media: Hardcover
Pages: 320
Number Of Items: 1
Shipping Weight (lbs): 1.1
Dimensions (in): 8.4 x 5.6 x 1.2
ISBN: 0061256684
Dewey Decimal Number: 647.95068
EAN: 9780061256684
Publication Date: August 1, 2008
Availability: Usually ships in 1-2 business days
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Product Description
According to The Waiter, eighty percent of customers are nice people just looking for something to eat. The remaining twenty percent, however, are socially maladjusted psychopaths. Waiter Rant offers the server's unique point of view, replete with tales of customer stupidity, arrogant misbehavior, and unseen bits of human grace transpiring in the most unlikely places. Through outrageous stories, The Waiter reveals the secrets to getting good service, proper tipping etiquette, and how to keep him from spitting in your food. The Waiter also shares his ongoing struggle, at age thirty-eight, to figure out if he can finally leave the first job at which he's truly thrived.
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| Customer Reviews: Read 150 more reviews...
 "Office Space" of the Restaurant world July 21, 2008
Colleen M. Schneider (San Lorenzo, CA USA)
50 out of 53 found this review helpful
As I read "Waiter Rant", I couldn't help but think that this truly was a bit like the cult film "Office Space", but for the restaurant world. Parts of the book were just flat out funny, in that kind of way that Office Space is funny to those of us who work in the corporate world.
I found I liked "the waiter" from the beginning. He is cynical, he is funny, he is smart, witty and above all not going to take a lot of "#%*%" from you if you start acting like a moron at the establishment he works at.
In the book you get the real picture of what goes in the back, the tyrannical bosses, the mal-adjusted waitstaff, the psycho customers, the good, the bad and the ugly. There are stories of meat sent back one too many times, a roaming squirrel in the dining room, and the case of the coffee that just wasn't hot enough (until the waiter fixes that for good). As he says in the book "Vengeance is mine, sayeth the Waiter". Rule 1: Always be nice to the waitstaff.
I must admit, that I had never read the waiter's prize winning blog before, so I was completely new to his writing, but hope that he keeps up the writing and entertaining us for years to come, in whatever direction his life takes him.
Oh, and do NOT miss the 40 tips on how to be a good customer, noted in the back of the book. Not only are these written with humor, but are truly those things that many of us fellow diners wish that you would stop (ahem, hel-lo cell phone users.....we are trying to have a romantic dinner here and do not really need to know about your mother's kidney stones).
Great Job "Waiter", I would give you a 25% tip for this one, and a smiley on the check to boot :)
Wishing you much success with the book, it was a great read!
So, a priest walks into a restaurant... July 19, 2008
Patrick Oden (Lake Arrowhead, CA United States)
97 out of 109 found this review helpful
I was at a nice restaurant with my now fiance. A man walked in with a small group and proceeded to raise a ruckus. He didn't like the table they assigned. He didn't like the next table. He got angry and firm, finally taking a table near the back despite the protest of the staff. Quite rude and quite thinking he was the only one in the restaurant.
When he sat down his mother, who likely taught him such behavior, said, "First you give them a chance to do it right, then you help them do it right."
We laughed out loud. Their assumption of what they were owed did not disguise the fact they were merely boors.
I'm glad I don't have to deal with such people every day.
But waiters and waitresses do.
The author of this book started out thinking he would like to help people as a priest. He began to study for the priesthood but left when the corruption and the scandals started getting too much. Had a degree in psychology and tried his hand in the mental health care business. Also corrupt and scandal-ridden. Stayed honest, got fired.
Wandered around a little. His brother got him a job in a restaurant. Also corrupt and scandal-ridden, but at least there are no illusions. Stays a waiter. Moves to a nicer place. Begins to write about his experiences on a blog. Then in this book.
That's the background.
The book is a memoir of sorts, but not a typical kind. It's anonymous. It also dwells on a particular setting and makes particular points along the way. It's a memoir with a mission, and this is to illuminate the often hidden world of restaurants. The Waiter, as he is known, touches on important concepts such as management, illegal immigration, rude customers, good and bad service, holidays, waiter revenge, hygiene, and assorted other topics. Each chapter has a particular theme.
Yet, these themes aren't at all obvious at first. The writing is that good. The Waiter is brilliant at showing not telling, that tricky art that foils lesser writers. We are given a story, not a mere rant. He is descriptive, insightful, observing, and honest. The themes are held within an overall story that is his life, a life that has many twists and turns and disappointments.
These disappointments and disillusionment become our boon, however. Because of his background, and his great capability, we are given a wonderful view into an often disguised world. The Waiter brings to bear not only his expertise at his profession, but also psychological and spiritual insights, making this book a surprising deep read. But never overbearing and certainly never self-righteous. The honesty sometimes ventures into the vulgar, but always understandably so. It's not only the story of a man trying to find his way and providing great commentary as he goes. It's also a manual of restaurant etiquette and personalities, becoming a mirror to our often unconsidered actions.
This really is a great book, amazing insight and amazing writing throughout. Profound and readable, all while dwelling on often mundane issues. I'm going to be recommending this to most everyone I know.
Now, I sort of wish he went back into the priesthood, or maybe tried out being a Protestant pastor. I can only imagine how good he would do looking at the convoluted world of church life. But, I suspect his mission is greater than that.
He's a waiter. He's really a writer. And this book should be bought. Brilliant book. Ten stars if I could.
I like to think of myself as the 20% tipper... July 16, 2008
S. Chi (Princeton, NJ)
36 out of 39 found this review helpful
I like to eat, dabble in cooking, read the usual food blogs, but hitherto reading the WR, I must confess that I have never heard of the WaiterRant blog or the mysterious Waiter. (One does however, learn the Waiter's first name by the end of the book. And more importantly, as I learned on wikipedia, the Waiter will shed his anonymity at 7:00 PM on Tuesday, July 29th at Borders Books inside the Time Warner Building in Manhattan.)
The Waiter details his beginnings at Amici's, where we meet the first of several psychopathic and dysfunctional managers, fellow waiters, and restaurant owners. He survives the baptism, and soldiers on as a manager at The Bistro for the next six odd years. He deftly handles the crucible that is The Bistro throughout a variety of situations; supervising the infamous Russell Crowe visit, deflecting Fluvio's rants and video camera spying, and handling the day to day obnoxious customers. Some of the chapters may have come from his blog postings, but perhaps the more faithful fans can tell me which portions were newly added.
After finishing the book, his rants inspired me to a bit of introspection regarding how to better treat the wait staff. I've asked for a different table other than my assigned table before. It's amazing what waiters have to put up with, and you will definitely appreciate them more after a good reading. Want suggestions on how to tip better? Then check out Chapter 9, ppg. 105-118. The book also comes with appendices on how to be a better customer (when ordering wine, don't sniff the cork), how to tell you're at a bad restaurant (just look at the employees' bathroom), and tips for waiters. And guys, if you're taking a girl out on a date, the Waiter suggests tipping at least 20%, because she will know.
My one complaint against the Waiter? 30 Minute Meals is his favorite show on FoodTV.
Excellent! Above & Beyond a Rant; Entertaining, Reflective, Articulate July 18, 2008
C. Stephans
9 out of 10 found this review helpful
Waiter Rant greatly exceeded my expectations. I was expecting a slapstick, sophmoric diatribe on the antics that occur in restaurants. Granted, it has some of that, but on the whole, Waiter Rant is a memoir of high order.
The author inserts entertaining episodes from his career as a waiter into the larger context of a deep, reflective memoir. The writing is superb in both the narrative and autobiographical styles that it includes.
Waiter Rant offers glimpses of the author's background and perspectives. We learn he had ambitions of priesthood and graduated from seminary with a degree in psychology after turning in a different direction. He definitely possesses the thoughtfulness and depth of insight one might expect from a seminary graduate. This is combined with the rough and tough world of mental healthcare and the restaurant business in NYC. The product is something for every reader to enjoy and appreciate.
There is no doubt that the main attraction to this book is the insights and episodes from the restaurants where the Waiter works. These are interesting, funny, sad, and astonishing. The narrator, the Waiter, is likeable, endearing, conflicted, honest, open, etc.,--all those things that are the foundation of a good autobiographical work along with writing talent and the ability to make it interesting. This is the total package.
This book will naturally appeal to readers who work in the restaurant field, but I never have and really enjoyed it. You don't have to have any connections to restaurants besides eating at them to enjoy this book.
When finishing reading Waiter Rant, I had the feeling I have after reading all good memoirs...that of wanting more. I hope the Waiter delivers a second course. (I know that was probably the cheesiest line I have ever written, but it is true.)
Review by the author of Shakespeare On Spirituality: Life-Changing Wisdom from Shakespeare's Plays
WAITER RANT, READER RAVE August 19, 2008
Lorenzo
6 out of 6 found this review helpful
Well,, he started out studying for the priesthood, graduated college and went to work for a health care organization. After a series of disappointments in each of these areas he donned an apron and became a waiter.
That's where the fun begins - sometimes for the author, always for the reader. While one surely sympathizes with the frustrations he found in trying to reach the goals he set for himself, he relates his trials, tribulations, and pyrrhic victories with such good humor and excellent prose that the end result is pure enjoyment for us.
Now, he has a real victory to celebrate - a best-selling book and hopefully another to come.
Atta' way to go, Waiter, and thanks for sharing.
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